I just want to say so many things that I can’t say in a text message but I’m too nervous to call. I’m such a nerd. The common concept of getting to know someone seems so lame, and I’ve forgotten how to talk to nice, intelligent girls in nice intelligent ways. I just want to be all like, tell me your life story and tell me what you think about at night when it’s really late and you can’t sleep and tell me about the tattoos you want and tell me about how your relationship with your father has impacted what you want to do with your life but it’s hard to say those things, but those are the things that make you fall in love with someone, not where they work, or what they ate for fucking breakfast. All this makes it sound like I’m some kinda fucking creep, but I’m just tired of beating around a bush.
“Envy, Trash Talk, La Dispute, Defeater… All these bands are doing it for the right reasons; they scream because they mean it. Put on a record and within the first line you hear the singer screaming because he needs to scream not because he’s in a hardcore band and that’s what you do when you’re in a hardcore band. That’s the most important thing, being able to discern between something real and a product.”—Jeremy Bolm, Touchè Amorè (via heywagbog)
Everyone these days wants constant communication. No care of the quality of it sometimes. Just wants it all the time. Text, messages, talking, whatever it may be. Please open your eyes and realize quality communication is what matters and grows relationships, whether friends or lovers.
Make the time you share matter. Say what you say with meaning. I’d rather have few quality encounters with people I love than constant meaningless time that can turn into feeling like an obligation instead of a relationship worth having. Live life and love hard
I have a friend I only talk to every 3 months or so, but he is the only person I have ever considered a best friend. So this post is spot on.
Simple steps I take to deal with a situation that might not be the one you wanted it to be, in work or anything else for that matter (but mostly, it will be your work).
1) Don’t react directly to the situation, remain calm, learn to extend your fuse. Be polite, move back from the epicentre of the problem.
2) Go off and release the negative energy any ‘private’ way you can, like writing it down, or drafting an email you never plan to send. Then destroy that memo. Do it a couple times if you have to but each time tone down the emotions.
3) Drink some water. Hydrate yourself.
4) Work out. Go for a run or a walk. Do some sit-ups or press-ups. While listening to something that drives you hard.
5) Have a luke warm/cold shower. Wash your hair, and everything else. Step out of the shower and let the cold air cover you. Take some deep breaths.
6) Have more water.
7) Sit quietly. Don’t communicate with anyone. Just sit quietly doing something simple yet enjoyable.
8) Make a cup of tea. Avoid caffeine and milk, aim for herbal/fruit teas that have a pleasant flavour or calming property. Let the tea cool and drink it while thinking about all of the aforementioned above.
9) Possibly listen to some softer music, read, or do whatever relaxes you. Maybe now you can hang with friends, but quite often I just want quiet.
10) Go to bed. Sleep on it. But sleep long and sleep well. Don’t attempt to do any work in the same evening/period. Flatten the batteries and then recharge them.
I promise you’ll wake up next day and feel thankful you have taken a professional and well rounded way of dealing with a situation that previously made you want to smash things to pieces. It’s perfectly acceptable to release the energies in private, but elsewhere you shouldn’t. Save those kinds of emotions for those rare moments where you need to actually protect yourself or a loved one (and that’s the only time really you should use them). You’re not being a coward, you’re in fact being a much stronger human being. Each time you cope with something that causes you anguish, you learn how quickly to turn it from a negative into something positive. You know in future how to sidestep these situations. It honestly is not some ‘guru bullshit’, it works. I do it every time I get wound up (believe it or not I used to have the shortest fuse known to man).
Emma woke up in darkness, suitcase already packed Note on the bedstand signed in blood, “Sincerely, never coming back.” A nightmare on my street the day she arrived A nightmarish household in which she died, because it made her feel at home Somehow made me feel at home
Before I start this I’m just going to say that I’m in a great mood right now for a lot of reasons, this is just what is on my mind currently.
Recently I’ve realized it’s okay to be fucked up. It’s okay to be sad, anxious, angry, and everything else. It is okay to feel whatever you feel. For a long time I tried to hide or ignore a lot of emotions, mostly anger. It has built up inside me knowing because I successfully hid it from myself for years and years. I told myself I wasn’t an angry, sad, or fucked up person. But I was and have been for a while, for reasons that I never dealt with and tried to keep put away. Recently I have told someone I really haven’t known that long (whole different topic) about a bunch of these things and it has opened new doors in my mind. Over the past few days I also have told a few of my family members about these things that they themselves did that caused me to let anger get inside of me and tear me apart. But now it isn’t going to tear me apart any longer. I started talking about it and getting it off my chest and good things happened, even if they haven’t taken their full effect yet. I lost a lot of things in the past 6 months or so, but I can only move forward. Someone said to me the other day: “If you are sad or angry, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living in the future. So just be happy and live in the present”. We are all human, we all feel, you can’t not feel. Telling yourself not to feel is like telling yourself not to breathe. And that will kill you. But when you feel anything, put the bad in the past and use the good to influence the future.